Re: draft announcement, version 2.0

[Justina Curtis <justina@c2o.org>]

Hello, 

My apologies for not writing in earlier. 

At 03:33 PM 3/27/00 +0000, pi villanueva wrote:

First bit looking good.

In goals:

>1.To train women's information providers in the use of group communication,
>web development tools, and  databases to be able to provide meaningful
>activities of their organizations, networks and localities. 

"provide meaningful activities" - is there a word missing here?
or maybe another phrase that implies effectiveness (meaningfulness?)
through sustainable information activities. 

Track 1 description v good. 
Track 2 description v good.
Track 3 description makes me want to apply.

>Participants should plan to be at the workshop location by the evening of
>June 18, and 
>plan to leave Seoul by June 26. 

The wording "leave Seoul by June 26" sounds quite harsh. Maybe "leave on
June 26" reads better.
Would you reiterate people remain for graduation, or are the above dates
enough.. (It's abit sad when people leave prior to graduation.) 

>To applying via WEB, fill up application form in
>http://www.women.or.kr/~went2000/apply

Nice one, SK!

--

Altogether, Pi, and editors, a great announcement!


-jc
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AWORC-TRAIN is the workspace of the Asian Women's Resource Exchange for
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